Hi Ladies, I've been very neglectful off my blog the past few weeks for obvious reasons
but I am getting back on the wagon and promise to be do more frequent posts. It's just so hard as I said, to find the motivation to do anything after having a baby. All I want to do is laze around and be with our little boy. The past five weeks have went by in a world wind but I don't want to ramble too much as this will probably be a long enough post!!
The reason I'm sharing my story is because I have been so open about my pregnancy from the get go and there's no point in hiding anything now. I don't however want to put any expecting mothers off labour but I will try to be as honest as I feel necessary, well in all honesty pushing a baby out of ones va ja ja isn't going to be a walk in the park now is it?! So before I begin, for the expecting mothers reading this obviously it hurt like a bitch I would rather have chopped my leg off in that moment and time but we are women, we are made to give birth, unlike men! So, brave a smile and push on my lovelies!
So, as you all know my due date was the 7th July, but did our wee man want to make an appearance then? No!! Of course he didn't, I went ten days over my due date much to my annoyance! Ladies.... I tried EVERYTHING. I mean I did it all, from eating two big pineapples in one go to drinking cup after cup off raspberry tea leaf, to bouncing like a mad man on the ball, running up and down the stairs, power walking, eating Madras Indian curries and yes the same thing that got me my wee man as well!!
The day after my due date which was the 8th I was back in the hospital for a check-up and my consultant was happy to let me go home and see if anything happened naturally. After trying all of the above, I was back for another routine check-up the following week which was Wednesday 15th. My consultant had decided to set a date to induce me which was Monday 20th of July, much to my annoyance as I just wanted it over and done with at this stage. After giving me an internal examination and a sweep to see if it would kick start anything I was sent home and told to be back in Drogheda hospital on Monday morning at 6.00 am to be induced. That night me and himself watched a movie and just chilled hoping something might happen but I felt no different and had an early night, but baba had different plans! I bolted awake at ten to six on the Thursday morning and sat up in the bed because honestly I didn't know why I was awake and then I felt wet running down my leg and nearly had a heart attack with excitement, I started shouting ''Conor, Conor, I think my waters are breaking''. So I hopped out off bed and ran for the bathroom leaving a trail of water behind me and made it to the shower just in time for what I can only say as an eruption of water! No joke it was like you see in the movies, it just exploded everywhere. I was drenched. I just stood there looking thinking ''sweet mother of Jesus it's happening''. After a couple of minutes I took everything off, grabbed a towel and went back into our bedroom, but water was still leaking so I just stood there on a towel feeling over the moon that he was finally coming. Me and Conor where literally sooooo excited. I rang the hospital and told them and because I was feeling no pain they told me to take my time, have a shower and grab some breakfast and make my way to the hospital. And I did just that. I had my shower and then sat for well over an hour turning myself into a princess!!
I blow-dried and straightened my hair, done my make-up (highlighted and contoured the shit out of my face!!) painted my nails, applied body butter all over myself so I smelled fab for all the nurses, picked out a wee dress, had a coffee and off I went out the door with my wee bag thinking this was a walk in the park! On our way up in the car we where sending snapchats, had the radio on singing away, ringing all the fam bam and our friends, literally buzzing! Half way up the motor way I got this small twinge of pain and it kind off stopped me in my tracks, but went as soon as it came. Seven minutes later I got another one, and I was like ''okay, that was a bit sore but nothing I couldn't handle'' I got a few here and there but when I got to the hospital there was nothing. I was examined by the nicest midwife ever and she told me unfortunately I wasn't in established labour, my cervix hadn't really softened and I wasn't dilating at all. I was going to be sent home, but they decided to keep me in because off being monitored. While we where waiting on a bed, they lovely Midwife gave us some tea and toast and done all the rest of the mandatory procedure and off we went up to the labour ward.
For the rest of the morning we just relaxed and watched the shitty Golf ( sorry for anyone who is a Golf fan, but it was the last thing I wanted to watch but himself loves it and I was told it was The Opening or some shite) so we watched it and then at about half twelve I got a pain that made me sit up in the bed. After that I got them more and more frequently and at three o' clock I decided I better tell the nurse as I wasn't sure what was happening. She had a feel of my tummy and told me I was in Labour and suggested I take a bath to help with the pain. Conor ran me a bath and left me to my own devices but I was only in it five minutes and needed to get out because I was in so much pain. It took me so so long to get dressed again because I was getting contractions every few minutes and at this stage I was starting to moan with the pain. I finally got myself ready and went out to my room and asked Conor to get the nurse, that I needed some pain relief, and what was I giving? Fucking paracetamol!! Well I was actually so annoyed at this but downed the hatch with them anyway and then I was giving a heat pack. Obviously this done absolutely nothing for the pain, it wasn't my period I had for Gods sake I was having a baby and I was fuming!!! Anyway, at about six o' clock this Midwife finally gave me some Pethidine. This made me feel super woozy and sick but I got about half an hour sleep after taking it, but when I woke I just started to vomit and I was still in pain.
From about seven that evening until half ten that night it was a blur because at this stage I was getting four contractions every ten minutes and I was in agony. My mum, stepdad and Conors dad where with me at this stage and I was begging the nurse for the epidural. I was told I couldn't have it as I wasn't 3cm dilated but after another while they checked again and I was taking down to the delivery suite at eleven o'clock that night. When I got down, I was prepped for the Epidural but because my waters had broken the previous morning I needed bloods to be taking to make sure I had no sign of infection. This took over two hours, much to my extreme annoyance but, I was giving the gas and air in the meantime and maaaaaaaaaan did I love that shit!! I was away with the fairies in the arse whole of nowhere when I took it! It done me wonders for the first few hours, Conor was actually recording me and sending snapchats to my friends and I was out off it! He even had a sneaky few goes of it!
My bloods took two and a bit hours to process because first they didn't take enough blood and had to do this twice and then again it said it was an inconsistent read. During this time the Anaesthesiologist was coming in and out off my room to see if my bloods came back so I decided while I was high on gas and air, to do some ass kissing thinking this would make her give it to me quicker, I told her how amazing her hair was, and asked her all about her ''fab'' lipstick she had on!! I wasn't wise at all, but after one o'clock I was finally giving the go ahead for the Epidural. Unfortunately it didn't work for me, and after the second attempt my left leg went slightly numb but I could feel pain everywhere else. They decided to take it out a few centimetres and up my dose but this didn't work either. Through all of this baby was being monitored and the Midwives didn't seem happy with his progress and decided to prep me for and emergency section. As Conor was in the car having a nap, this was about five or six in the morning, they told me to ring him to come back over Asap as I would be in surgery within the next half hour. After removing all of my make-up, my nail varnish, jewellery and being prepped I was then told I wasn't having one by a Doctor. This sent me crazy as I was in so much pain, I had no pain relief and I was exhausted at this stage I was in labour all in all for 24 hours. I actually begged them for a section but I didn't get one. I won't go into too much detail but a few things happened between the next six hours that I wasn't happy about and which caused me to become very stressed during the rest of my labour. I was eventually put on a morphine drip, which basically gives a flow off morphine into your bloodstream when you press this button. Bad thing is, the button was on a timer, and knocked me unconscious for about ten seconds and It had to be removed. Just after ten, I actually think it was half ten I felt like I needed to push but I was told not to because I was only eight centimetres.
Trying not to push was so difficult because I felt the urge so much but I some how managed not too until after eleven when I just couldn't help it any longer I needed to. So sneaky Rachy started pushing on the q.t thinking no one would notice but obviously they did, but I was giving the go ahead as I was finally ten centimetres. When you push the Midwives will say push like you need a pooh and they will say when to push and when to stop but in all honesty you just want it to be over. Ten minutes before Jaxon was born there was a lot of people in the room so I started to get scared and felt like giving up but this lovely Doctor came over and introduced himself and told me he was going to give me a hand with getting Jaxon here. I knew what this meant and I was to say the lest petrified and tried to trash and kick my legs as much as I could. I would say to anyone who finds themselves in a similar position not to panic like I did as they are only trying to get baby there as soon as possible and sooner they help the quicker it's over. So after 30 hours of labour and fifty minutes of pushing baby Jaxon Bell was born at 12:58 on the 17th of July weighing a healthy 8 pounds 4 oz.
It was crazy seeing him lying on my chest, after the whole process I just bursted into tears because I couldn't believe it was over and I couldn't believe my baby boy was finally here. When I was pushing when his head came out they where telling me to look but I honestly couldn't I just wanted him out completely and here with me and his Daddy. Seeing him for the first time was amazing, I was in a complete state of shock and I actually couldn't touch him I just kept crying. He was taking to be cleaned and weighed etc, and then my body went into shock and started shaking uncontrollably. When the nurses said he needed to be taking to ICU I couldn't even hold him and as well I actually didn't want to. Now I know people might read this and think what?! why?! Well I can't really explain it other than I was in such a state of shock, I had a very traumatic time and I couldn't believe the pain was gone. Conor was amazing and gave him all the cuddles and after about five minutes our wee boy was brought away to be giving some special treatment in the special baby unit.
After I was cleaned up and giving some orange juice which I downed like shots of Tequila I was brought to see my wee man in ICU, I don't really want to go into too much detail regarding this but I must say the nurses and Doctors who work in that unit are truly amazing and I can't thank them enough for looking after our wee boy.
After six days myself and Jaxon where discharged from hospital and it was the best feeling in the world finally getting home with my baby and being able to be with Conor and recuperate.
To any expectant mother, take all the help you can get, I was as stubborn as ever and tried to do everything and more all on my own but realistically I was codding no one I was still in a lot of pain and was dosed up to the eyeballs on pain relief etc and was only causing myself more harm. It's been over five weeks and yea I am starting to feel normal again physically but I am not ashamed to say it took it's tole on me mentally. I still get upset when I think off my labour and I've shed a few tears writing this but It was also therapeutic.
I had a traumatic experience and I am not saying that's how it will be for anyone else as everyone is different. I am just sharing my experience. It's just unfortunate that this is what happened but looking at Jaxon I would hand on heart do anything for him and would do it again if it meant he would be with me. He is amazing and to say I am in awe and head over heels in love is an under statement. It's crazy the love you feel and there's times I just look at him and start crying because I can't believe we made such a perfect human being. He is doing amazing and yes he had a shaky start but he is a wee brute now and just wants all the food in the land and to sleep beside his Mam and Dad. I'm actually laughing thinking I am a mam, I never thought I would be sitting writing something like this ever.
He's actually asleep on Conor here beside me and now I just want to go and kiss the face off him!! I forgot to say through all of my labour my man was the best in the whole entire world. He literally kept me going and if it wasn't for him I don't know what I would have done, he was amazing and I couldn't love him and more than I do.
Thank you to everyone off my friends and family, over the past few weeks I needed the most support I've ever needed and I got just that and more. I love yous all.
To all of my readers, thank you for having patience with me over the past few weeks and if anyone would like to talk to me if yous have had similar experiences or even just want to ask questions I am here to talk or listen.
Love BV xx
